Synopsis

Attraction isn't just about chemistry. It's tied to meaning, and meaning can change. In a long-term marriage, what we find desirable in a spouse is shaped less by biology and more by the meanings underlying the relationship. When those meanings shift, desire shifts with them — leaving you either pulling away from a spouse you once desired, or trying to make sense of one who's pulled away from you.

In this episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife answers listener questions about attraction, touching on how to build desire in a marriage where it wasn't there to begin with, what it means when a spouse admits they don't feel attracted to you, and how old patterns of resentment and control can undercut desire without either partner realizing it.

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The advice offered through Dr. Finlayson-Fife’s Podcast Archive is educational and informational in nature and is provided only as general information.  It is not meant to establish a therapist-patient relationship or offer therapeutic advice, opinion, diagnosis treatment or to establish a standard of care.  Although Dr. Finlayson-Fife is a trained psychotherapist, she is not functioning in the role of a licensed therapist during these sessions, but rather using her training to inform these sessions.  Thus, the content is not intended to replace independent professional judgment.  The content is not intended to solicit clients or patients; and should not be relied upon as medical or psychological advice of any kind or nature whatsoever.  The information provided through the Content should not be used for diagnosing or treating a mental health problem or disease.  The information contained in these communications is not comprehensive and does not include all the potential information regarding the subject matter, but is merely intended to serve as one resource for general and educational purposes.