We all get into ruts sometimes, whether it’s our exercise routines, food choices, or the types of books we read. Routines are normal and comfortable, but they can also make us vulnerable to periods of stagnation and boredom. This is particularly true in marriage. We love the excitement and uncertainty of early love, but once we marry, many of us look to create predictability and routine in our marriages and families that create comfort, but a kind of false safety. If you know what to expect from your day to day experience with your partner, that can give us a sense of security, but also becomes boring and deadening. We stop seeing each other as unique individuals. Date night often becomes the same old dinner and movie, often at the same place, day of the week, and even time of day. You feel “safe” in your relationship, but does it feel alive? Does the relationship you've created challenge and expand you?
A regular date night isn’t the problem, and in fact it’s a great way to connect with your spouse or significant other. The problem is often that couples limit the adventure and novelty when they are together. So what can you do? Do something new with your partner that you've never done before. Try something that is challenging and expands both your experience of yourself and your experience of your spouse. A great way to do this is through a date-box service like Rendezvous. Rendezvous is a dating service, started by a friend of mine, that takes the stress out of trying to find novel, interesting dates. With busy schedules, it’s hard to find time to think of new things to do and organize the details to make it enjoyable. The Salt Lake-based company Rendezvous curates dates specific to your interests, so you’re certain to go on dates that are new and exciting and something both of you will enjoy. Every date is scheduled, prepaid, and designed just for you. The happiest couples report that their marriage expands their sense of themselves. That is to say they discover new parts of themselves in the context of the marriage. (In contrast, the most unhappy couples experience their marriages as restrictive or limiting of their ability to stretch and grow). So the more you stretch your experiences together as a couple, the closer you'll grow and the more passion you'll feel, for life and for one another. So be brave, and put the spark back into your relationship through creative curated dates. Check out Rendezvous at www.RendezvousBox.com to receive your next experience together.